Month: September 2020

  • 17. Cash in the hanky

    This week we meet the sauciest man in War and Peace, and boy does he like sauce. We're talking béarnaise, we're talking béchamel, we're talking classic gravy - this man has tried them all and has found a place for most of them on his clothes.

    Plus we're spending some quality time with WAP's two old and dearest friends. But will their insatiable lust for money bring these best buds closer together, or push them apart - like two halves of a wallet stuffed full of CASH?

    Tune in this week to see how this tenuous simile plays out.

  • 16. The Con is on

    If you thought you could kidnap a policeman, tie him to a stolen bear, then push them both in the canal and wonder off without any consequences, think again!

    Join us this week as Pierre's dark, bear filled past rears its furry head to cause moderate to severe embarrassment. Can Pierre take the heat, or will his social standing be torn to shreds by the vicious claws of gossip?

    Plus - CUE FUNKY CRIME MUSIC - we're casing the joint with two of War and Peace's wiliest slicksters - they're buttering up with one hand, and looking for Cecil's mountain of cash with the other. Will they pull off the con of the century or will they end up in the clink? CUE MONTAGE.

    Show notes

    Lucia's incredible drawing of Pierre's handsWhat the hand?! Another hand drawing! Yes! More hands! Han-believable! Lucia (pronounced the Italian way) from the USA sends in this formidable artistic rendering of Pierre's infamous arm-ending appendages. Thank you Lucia! Find out more about this inspiring piece by subscribing to the newsletter and visiting Tolstoy's Hall of Fame.

  • 15. Uncle in the bedroom

    There's an uncle in the bedroom
    A bedroom made of gold
    An uncle the most handsome
    In all Russia, it's been told

    "We'd like to see the uncle please
    Before he goes and dies
    We've heard he's freakin loaded
    And we were passing by"

    There's an uncle in the bedroom
    In this week's episode
    Listen now, and have no fear
    The actual show's in prose

  • 14. This is so diplomat!

    This week the generations are at war.

    On one side, the mysterious Vera. Handsome as they come, her mouth quite possibly brimming with spiders - and now, terrifying new rumours that she wields dark and unnatural powers.

    On the other side, four hopeful children. Innocent as tiny little ducklings, their only weapons are the power of love and some really quite cutting insults they have just invented.

    But will their incantations be enough to overpower the ice hearted Vera? Or will the good house Rostóv be consumed with pure spidery evil?

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