19. Napoleon vs. The World

Between the endless servings of turtle burgers, whole pineapples and free refill wine you could be forgiven for thinking that everything in the world was amazing and perfect.

Perhaps after dinner we will dance? Perhaps tomorrow there will be another party? Perhaps it will be this way forever? Perhaps.

But behind the totally sweet riffs of the Gravy Boaters, a new tune is starting to play. Under the wicked great banjo solo is the clink of bayonets, through the vibrant buzz of the kazoo is the hiss of the cannon’s fuse, and melding with the sick licks of the didgeridoo is the distant drone of death.

With every chunk you tear from your personal pineapple, the sound gets louder – dinner’s nearly over, and war is for dessert.

Show notes

A sensational drawing of Count Rostov, covered in sauceWow. Just wow. We’ve died and gone to WAP heaven. Suriah from the US sends in this phenomenally sensational drawing of Count Rostov – round, proud and dripping with sauce, it’s the perfect rendition of the perfect man. Thank you Suriah, this is quite possibly the best thing ever made.

Take a look at Suriah’s drawing in FULL HD, and see the other brilliant things people have sent in, over at Tolstoy’s Hall of Fame.